Tuesday, May 5, 2009

natural selection is shitty sometimes

y'all know that i try not to bring things from my work life here into the blogosphere but sometimes things are just too good to pass up. one such monumentally stupid thing occurred and i had to share with you.

i was sent to the hospital to meet with a man who had been at a party and had ingested a caustic liquid at the urging of other partygoers. this unfortunate soul was dared to drink a shot glass of ammonia and, as any self-respecting reveler would, he did it.
i was speaking with the attending ER doc who was explaining the procedure for putting this humpty dumb-ass back together again and learned that they were going to have to remove most of the patient's esophagus and replace it with a section of his colon. then, with an emotionless delivery, the doctor said candidly, "That guy's breath is going to smell like shit for the rest of his life." thinking he was joking, i laughed. the doctor turned to me and said, with that same deadpan delivery, "That wasn't a joke."


i told you natural selection was shitty,


Amy said...

Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew!

Rob said...



fiddlemethis said...

Notes to self:

1. Do not drink ammonia, ever.

2. Provision in living will: cloth diapers only :-)